Watching With All Perseverance by Elder David A Bednar, Quorum of the Twelve Apostles

This was one of the best talks for parents that I have ever heard! I'd like to highlight some of the key points that Elder Bednar made that I really liked. To read the complete talk (and I highly recommend you do), please go to this link.

He gives this talk in hopes of helping parents develop "a spiritual early warning system that can help [them] to be watchful and discerning concerning their children." The system is composed of three basic components: (1) Read and talk to your kids about the Book of Mormon, (2) Bear testimony of gospel truths spontaneously with your children, and (3) Invite children as gospel learners to act and not merely be acted upon. These things will help parents recognize early signals of spiritual growth as well as challenges and help parents to be "better prepared to receive inspiration to strengthen and help" their children.

#1- Reading and Talking about the Book of Mormon
About the power of the Book of Mormon:

"The convincing and converting powers of the Book of Mormon come from both a central focus upon the Lord Jesus Christ and the inspired plainness and clarity of its teachings." 

He says that because the Book of Mormon (1) focuses on the Savior and (2) teaches very plainly, it "speaks to the spirit and to the heart of the reader like no other volume of scripture." More benefits of reading the Book of Mormon with our kids:

"Regular reading of and talking about the Book of Mormon invite the power to resist temptation and to produce feelings of love within our families. And discussions about the doctrines and principles in the Book of Mormon provide opportunities for parents to observe their children, to listen to them, to learn from them, and to teach them."

Some of these quotes are just too good to paraphrase, this is how he ends this section:

"Youth of all ages, even infants, can and do respond to the distinctive spirit of the Book of Mormon. Children may not understand all of the words and stories, but they certainly can feel the “familiar spirit” described by Isaiah (Isaiah 29:4; see also 2 Nephi 26:16). And the questions a child asks, the observations a child shares, and the discussions that occur provide crucial spiritual early warning signals. Importantly, such conversations can help parents to discern what their children are learning, thinking, and feeling about the truths contained in this sacred volume of scripture, as well as the difficulties they may be facing."

#2- Bearing Testimony Spontaneously
Elder Bednar explains that "testimony is personal knowledge, based upon the witness of the Holy Ghost, that certain facts of eternal significance are true." What a great definition! As he explains how we should bear testimony to our children, he says that "such occasions need not be programmed, scheduled, or scripted." In fact, it's best when it is spontaneous. He also teaches that a testimony "need not always begin with the phrase 'I bear you my testimony.'" He explains that you should note the reactions of your children as you bear testimony to them- here's why:

"The reactions of children to such impromptu testimony bearing and their eagerness or reluctance to participate are potent sources of spiritual early warning signals. A child’s expression about a lesson learned in family scripture study or a candid statement of concern about a gospel principle or practice can be most illuminating and help parents better understand a child’s specific question or needs. Such discussions—especially when parents are as eager to listen intently as they are to talk—can foster a supportive and secure environment in the home and encourage ongoing communication about difficult topics."

#3- Inviting Children to Act
This is a great illustration of his point:

"Giving a man a fish feeds him for one meal. Teaching a man to fish feeds him for a lifetime. As parents and gospel instructors, you and I are not in the business of distributing fish; rather, our work is to help our children learn “to fish” and to become spiritually steadfast. This vital objective is best accomplished as we encourage our children to act in accordance with correct principles—as we help them to learn by doing. “If any man will do his will, he shall know of the doctrine, whether it be of God” (John 7:17). Such learning requires spiritual, mental, and physical exertion and not just passive reception."

If you have children, here are some questions to ponder: 

"Are you and I helping our children become agents who act and seek learning by study and by faith, or have we trained our children to wait to be taught and acted upon? Are we as parents primarily giving our children the equivalent of spiritual fish to eat, or are we consistently helping them to act, to learn for themselves, and to stand steadfast and immovable? Are we helping our children become anxiously engaged in asking, seeking, and knocking?"

One of the reasons it is so important that our children learn to act on their own is that "the tuition of diligence and of learning by study and also by faith must be paid to obtain and personally 'own' such a knowledge." Our children need to learn to act for themselves in spiritual ways - not just physically - so that they are "prepared spiritually for the challenges of mortality."


In conclusion, I'd like to share Elder Bednar's testimony of these principles:

"The spiritual discernment and inspiration you will receive from the combination of these three holy habits will enable you to stand as watchmen on the tower for your families"